Shared Suffering
by Princess Shania
Summary: Dis is struggling to carry on after her husband's tragic and untimely death. Fortunately for her, and her young son Fili, she has her older brother to step in.
1. Lost

**Have you ever had a fic where you didn't even know where the thought came from? Well, this is one.**

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><p><em>'Shared suffering brings people together faster than anything else does'<br>_- Unknown

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><p>Fili shivered as he hugged his knees to his chest. Nothing felt <em>right<em>. The sun's light was darkened, colours were dull and everything felt so _strange _without Da there. It had been so quick, one day Da had been right there, throwing him up in the air, kissing Mama, and then...

Fili didn't know what happened to Da. No one told him, though someone had obviously told Mama, which had made his mother drop to her knees suddenly shrieking a howl of such agony he'd run and hid under his bed.

Mama had changed. The brightness that shone from her own blue eyes had dimmed like a dying star and her movements were slow and trembling like a baby's first steps. Her black hair, so different from his own flowing gold, had turned lifeless and dull.

It was as though he'd lost both his parents.

Fili just wanted to hug her, but when he did, she didn't seem to realise he was even there. No longer living, she was simply existing and Fili longed more than anything to see her life and joy return.

She was hurting, he knew, and hurting terribly. Why else would she be so quiet and pale? He lightly tugged her sleeve. "Mama?"

She continued to stare into nothing, though her eyes briefly flickered. He tried again. "Mama!"

"Yes, Fili?"

"When is Uncle coming home?"

Uncle Thorin looked a lot like his mama, with the same blue eyes and black hair, but he was serious of eye and they rarely saw him because he was always busy. Still, Fili had no doubt that his uncle would help his mother. Thorin loved Dis very much, Fili knew. He loved them all, he said, which was how Fili knew they would be alright once Uncle came back.

"He'll.. be- He'll be home by Friday." Mama answered. She pulled herself up from her seat and looked back down at her son. "Have you had lunch yet?"

"I'm not hungry," Fili answered.

Dis didn't answer. Instead, she tore a chunk of bread from the loaf inside the bread-box and brought a saucepan out. "You need to eat, my son," she murmured. "Otherwise- Just eat for me, please."

It had been the most Dis had said in a long while, and he reached to her sleeve again. "Mama, are you angry with me?"

"What? No. Of course not." Dis knelt down, drawing Fili nearer and resting her forehead against his. "Mama's... tired, sweetheart. Not angry with you."

"I miss Da," Fili said, curling the soft red of Dis' sleeve in his fist.

A choked sob escaped Dis. "I- I do, too, _muhud_." She stood, lifting Fili and hugged him tightly, kissing the top of his golden head. "Though I can't believe I'm admittin' this, I really _need_ your uncle. We both do."

"He'll be here by Friday." Fili repeated his mother's words.

"That's right," Dis said, pressing her cheek against Fili's forehead. "He'll be here in a few days."

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><p>Though he would gladly do anything to keep his sister living comfortably as conditions allowed, Thorin always disliked working away from home. He saw the top of the gate bordering his Halls and smiled. Soon, he would be seeing his nephew again, catching up with his sister and brother-in-law.<br>The gates-keeper swung the gates open and Thorin distinctly noticed an odd look in his eyes. Almost sad, he thought. What could have happened?

He glanced back at his kin who had accompanied him out of Ered Luin. "How are you holding up?"

"The last time I come along with him," Balin answered, looking pointedly at his brother.

"For the last time," Dwalin muttered, "t'was not I who started that mild argument..."

"That 'mild argument' ended with a broken arm!"

Thorin ignored their bickering, choosing to look around. His people were standing on either side, staring at him as he passed. Stopping his pony, he stared down at the nearest Dwarf.

"Is there something strange going on that I should know about?" he asked. "Only I have seen nothing but stares since I returned."

"Apologies, sire. There is bad news, however."

"What is it?" Thorin asked.

"There was a mine collapse where your sister and her husband worked..."

Thorin tensed.

"..Lady Dis wasn't hurt, but Fiach... he died."

Thorin was still and silent, gazing at the messenger. All of a sudden, he turned, hurling himself from his pony. Landing on his feet, he threw the reins over to the other male. "Put him back in the stables. I shall be with my sister."

He set off at a run, heading towards Dis' home. The thought of his sister pale and broken haunted his mind and as he drew closer to his destination, he internally cursed himself for leaving his family alone.

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><p><strong>Alright! First fic focused on the quartet of Dis, Fili, Kili (later on, anyway) and Thorin! It's going to focus on the relationship between brother and sister and uncle and nephew.<strong>

**Finally, because this is important, there will _NOT_** **be any incest. At all. I'm sorry if you want that, but I don't write it. Also, there likely won't be _any _romance at all, except past Fiach and Dis.**

**Hope it was enjoyed!**

**Love from Shania. xx**


	2. Dis' Saviour

Every single beat of her heart felt as though a dagger was plunging into her body. Everything hurt so badly and though it was stupid, she just wanted her brother to come along and fix it all.

Though even Thorin couldn't bring Fiach back from the dead.

She tried, _Mahal _she tried to keep everything together for her son. _'He's lost his da,'_ she reminded herself. _'He needs you. Don't give him reason to feel scared or anymore unhappy than he is'._

_'First my grandfather, father and brother, now my One,'_ she couldn't help think bitterly. _'What luck the women of Durin's line all have!'_

She knew of the Fading, that made Dwarves and Dwarrowdams alike fall into a deep, dark pit of misery and she refused to allow the illness to take her too. She'd seen her mother, she saw what had happened to a great deal of Durin's folk after the Dragon had stolen Erebor and devoured or burnt their loved ones. She knew too well the pain their children felt after their parents were dead and gone and she swore that there was no chance she would allow Fili that pain.

So she tried to stay strong, but the days passing with no Fiach were taking their toll on her and she knew it. All she thought of was him and she was losing track of time in her daydreams. She gave a small murmur of discontent.

The front door slammed.

She sat up straight. Was it Friday already? Yet, who else opened the door like that other than Thorin?

"Dis!"

His loud thuds echoed through the house. She closed her eyes, trying to block out their loud sounds. When she opened them again, it was to find a pair of eyes, the shade of her own staring directly at her.

"Oh, my sister. _Namadith. _I'm so sorry I was not with you.."

He was holding her hands, staring into her eyes with the tenderness he'd used when she'd been younger and had hurt herself. She ducked her head, suddenly grasping onto him. "Thorin, he's... My Fiach..."

"_Namadel." _Thorin took hold of her shoulders, pulling her forwards into a hug. "There, now."

He was talking to her exactly as though she had morphed back into a beardling and it would have infuriated her had it not been for the fact her brother was finally there. The last family she had left. "I don't know what I'm going to do, _nadad_. How can I possibly bring up my son alone?"

"Dis, you have the strength of a thousand armies." Thorin said, leaning back and holding onto her hands again. "And you won't be alone."

His hand had brushed its way up her cheek and she grabbed onto his fingers. "What if I Fade?"

"We won't let you die," Thorin promised, "By Mahal, who would boss us around if you're not here?"

Dis snorted, though Thorin's jest was feeble. As he moved, she spoke again. "Don't leave us. Please. It's too painful for us both to be alone."

"Stay at mine 'til the pain lessens," Thorin suggested. "Let _me _take care of _you _now, sister."

"And Fili."

"And Fili," Thorin agreed. "Where is he?"

"Asleep. He's getting tired quickly now."

"Gather some things. I'll get Fili." Thorin said. He pulled Dis to her feet and dropped a kiss to her brow. "Take what time you need."

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><p><em>"Fiach, for Mahal's sake! Don't you drop him now!"<em>

_Fiach's grin warned of the mischief he was about to get up to. "I won't- whoa!" He let Fili drop a centimeter through his large hands. "That was close!"_

_"You great idiot!" Dis laughed. She reached for his courting braid, giving it an affectionate tug._

_"What's the time?"_

_"It's just gone twelve," Dis answered. "Why?"_

_"The mines call," Fiach said, turning Fili upside-down. "Supposed to be there by one."_

_"Ah," Dis replied. "Well, you've got time for some stew, then."_

_"Is it good or is it yours?"_

_"It'll be in your face if you don't watch it!" Dis warned._

_Fiach pushed a strand of black away from Dis' eyes. "I was pulling your leg."_

_"I know," Dis smiled. "Come on, then."_

_Fili felt strange. Hands were pulling at him, a deep voice, unlike his da's soft lilt, surrounded him and his parents. He didn't know what was going on, and they were both going..._

"Fili!" Thorin called. A blue eye cracked open, swiftly followed by the other.

"Uncle?"

"Why are you still dressed?" Thorin asked, looking over his nephew's grey tunic.

"I couldn't pull my top off," Fili admitted. "Mama helps me with it, but she forgot today."

"I see. Let's get a fresh one on you, my lad."

"What's happening?" Fili asked as Thorin tugged it over his head.

"You're both staying with me for a while."

"Why?"

"So I can look after you and your mother. Arms up."

Once the new tunic was pulled over his head, Fili frowned. "Why not here?"

Thorin frowned too. He didn't look angry, just thoughtful. "It will be better for both of you," he said at last. He cupped the back of Fili's head. "Do you ever feel.. sad here?"

Fili was quiet. Sometimes he'd hear a noise, a door closing and he'd run to theirs, certain Da was returning, only to find he wasn't there. Or he'd see Da's slippers and wonder when he would be home before remembering. He glanced up into Thorin's watchful blue eyes. "Sometimes," he revealed in a small voice.

Thorin lifted him easily with one arm. Fili clung tightly to the shirt his uncle wore. "Da's dead." he said.

Thorin's fingers brushed at his cheeks, smearing a warm wetness that Fili hadn't known was there. "I know, sweetling. I'm very sorry to hear that."

"Mama gets sad a lot," Fili went on. "I don't know how to make her happy again."

Thorin rested his chin on Fili's head and took a slow, deep breath to combat the burning in his eyes. "We'll all help her. Every one of us."

"Will she be alright soon?"

Thorin pulled back and kissed his brow. "I believe so," he said after a while. "Your mother is a strong woman, Fili."

"Mmm. I know."

Thorin gave him a hug, rubbing his cheek into the thick, golden mop on his nephew's head and then bent, setting him safely on his own feet. "We'll go now," he informed him. "Let's go and find your _amad_, shall we?"

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><p><strong>Basically, I did a swaperoo with an old story of mine that I decided wasn't particularly needed. This thing was published 0609/14, not fifteen months or so ago, okay? :)**

**Hope it was enjoyed!**

**Love from Shania. xx**

**P.S. Yes, this will have Baby!Kili at some point (and I can't wait to write it!)**


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